everything i've been waiting for and more

Him: You don't know what men live for! We are complex creatures with many intricacies requiring the utmost attention.

Me: Ninja, please. All you need is sex, food, beer, ESPN, and someone to tell you your clothes don't match.

Him: Marry me!  You forgot golf, but that’s okay. It will give us something to work on.

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25 Comments

Justina said:

Haha! That is too funny.

Mel Heth said:

Ninja please? Brilliant.

Mel said:

ESPN is an all inclusive answer for sports of any kind, including dog racing, when there is no other sport to watch....

Finn said:

You should have flashed him a boob. That would have thrown the "complex creature" right off...

heidi said:

him who?!

Peter said:

You even got the order right. though I'd probably go for Scotch and Tivo over their aforementioned brethren.

Lindsay said:

He won me over at "Marry me! You forgot golf, but that's okay." So cute. :)

lawyerish said:

"Ninja please"

Too funny

riley said:

fish, are you withholding info?! or is this just a man friend? haha.

My goal this year is to be more like a man. Clearly I will have to get ESPN.

Lola said:

OMG too funny!!!

Permission to use "Ninja Please" !!!

Registered User said:

Mrs. Greg House:

And a penis.

CaliGal said:

LOLOL!! "complex creatures" LOLOLOLOL "intricacies"?!??! LOLOLOLOL "utmost attention"?!??! LOLOLOLOL

Oh...please stop.... it's starting to hurt... LOLOLOLOLOLOL

Tai said:

Ninja, please!

Oh my gosh, best thing I've ever heard.

steph said:

OHHHHH! NEW GUY??? He sounds great!

Jodie said:

For my 50-something hubby the list goes:
All you need is food, Coke Zero, digital cable (HBO & sports networks - baseball network add-on package), someone to email and someone to tell you your clothes don't match.

T in Nh said:

So true.... I love how they think there's no possible way we could/would EVER figure them out. One of the things I love most about my guy friends!

Mike said:

He seems simple. The evolved man also needs 45 uninterrupted minutes of commode time a day. For reading.

We also need a button sewer, but that is a direct exchange for spider killing.

Roxanne said:

"We also need a button sewer, but that is a direct exchange for spider killing."

Haha, so true!

My boyfriend claims that if I ever decided to become a licensed massage therapist, he'd marry me on the spot. I haven't taken him up on the offer yet, but it's good to know I have a secret weapon if I ever get too impatient.

Katie said:

Too funny! I love the matching clothes thing!

Trish Ryan said:

It's all about knowing what someone MEANS, even if it's not what they say :)

aliastaken said:

I thought his name was Ninja.

I did.

Lee said:

wait, where did you meet my husband?

ExposedNYC said:

Well, just to be fair, all we need is great kisses, comfortably cute shoes, wine, Grey's Anatomy, and a blog from Fish and that's a pretty damn good day...

D said:

So true!
@ExposedNYC: Are you for real?

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This fish needs a bicycle: If not for comfort, at least for entertainment's sake.

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